Thursday, July 13, 2017
Genealogical Kindness Needed
Seriously, folks, I've had my fill this week of dealing with difficult people. IMHO, life's too short for bad manners.
I have a very large online public tree on several sites. The reason it's large is because I've done surname studies over the last 20+ years for several lines with unique names - Duer, Harbaugh and Leininger. Taking the last family history book published, that would be 1947 for the Harbaughs and 1973 for the Leiningers, I've add all the info into the tree from those sources and then tried to prove the info was correct by adding additional citations. I then tried to update the original works going forward so that family could reconnect. The Duer information was unpublished; I received it from a family historian about 2010.
The gateway ancestor's for all of these lines died in the 19th century or earlier so some of those included in the tree are far removed from my direct line. I don't personally know these people. I made the tree public to help reconnect and aid in correcting any errors.
Three times this week I have heard from distant relatives and the comments/emails were rude. One woman told me my tree was confusing her. I offered to help but needed to know what was confusing about it. She said I had no pictures for a person she was interested in. Huh? I understand visual learning but really, you're complaining because there was no picture.
Later that day, someone posted a comment that they were sure I was wrong about a gateway ancestor because they had their Y-DNA done. I responded to please share and I'd be happy to look further. No response. I wouldn't have been concerned if the individual had emailed me privately but to post a comment and then not respond when someone is willing to check further is wrong.
That evening, I hit the trifecta when someone commented on another line that he was certain "you must have made this up." I was taken aback. Did you not look at the citations? Did you not see my comment that mentioned I concurred with other researchers that it was possible two brothers were confused so I included both names as the possible father?
The old adage we can choose our friends but not our relatives applies here! That last comment ticked me off so much that I considered making my tree private. I haven't done so because I think the good outweighs the few thoughtless individuals.
Thanks, dear readers, for reading my rant. Please help me spread genealogical kindness this week. It's sorely needed.
I will be taking a much needed vacation so will not have a blog post until I return the end of July.